How many times have you woken up after a night of drinking and felt like total shit?
You vow that you’ll never touch that stuff again as the pounding sensation in your head intensifies.
Maybe you’ve even experienced these crappy feelings after one or two glasses of wine.
The morning after is just awful.
You wake up:
- Feeling sluggish and tired as if you didn’t just get several hours of sleep
- You’re so dehydrated that water doesn’t even quench your thirst anymore
- You have a pounding headache or a headche-y feeling all morning and sometimes throughout the day
In short, you just don’t feel your best.
And this could happen after one drink or several.
I won’t get into the specifics of why this happens since there’s plenty of information out there that does a better job of explaining this than I could.
Instead, I want to share what I learned from going 100 days without alcohol.
Today’s lessons have nothing to do with alcohol and aren’t your typical I felt so great I had enough energy to run a marathon bs.
My journey wasn’t all unicorns and butterflies either. It was so friggen hard.
I stopped drinking on December 10th, 2017 and lasted til’ March 20th, 2017.
So I didn’t drink for Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, and every celebration, happy hour, and FSU bowl game in between.
See why it was tough?
But, that’s also why I chose to do it during this time specifically.
I wanted it to be a challenge.
I wanted it to have an impact.
And I wanted to see a real difference.
By this point, you’re probably thinking…
Why Go Booze-free in the First Place?
I didn’t start this experiment for anyone but myself.
No one gave me an intervention, and for the most part, nothing bad has come from my drinking (aside from those damn hangovers of course).
I really woke up one morning saying enough was enough.
I had a few glasses of wine the night before and woke up just feeling awful.
And it dawned on me that I had no one to blame but myself.
Sure, I was out drinking wine with friends and catching up like girls do, but no one was forcing me to drink.
I was doing it socially, after stressful work days, and anytime I felt like having a drink, which, mind you, was not that often.
I never really enjoyed the taste of alcohol either.
I think I enjoyed the carefree feelings the booze brought on more than the drinks themselves.
I didn’t overthink as much.
I could let my hair down, so to speak, without feeling so damn self conscious.
I also felt more comfortable socially despite the fact that sober me was just as interactive. It just felt easier with booze.
But one day, it all turned on me.
Well, actually, it was more like a few days.
In short, I started feeling crappy after drinking.
And it didn’t matter how much/little I drank or the type of booze I chose, I just woke up not feeling good.
So I vowed to finally put an end to this, a short one at least.
I committed to 30 days of no drinking.
As soon as I did this, all of those times I promised not to drink anymore instantly surfaced.
Who was I kidding?
I can’t do 30 days without booze.
That’s insane, right?
And if it wasn’t a problem for me, did I really have to cut it out for 30 days straight?
Couldn’t I be fine with just cutting back?
Once these thoughts started piling in, I knew the old me would have just retreated.
Cut back. Move on. No big deal.
But I wanted this time to be different.
I wanted to feel different.
And to do this, I had to commit 100%, which I did.
I started out with 30 days and only told some of my closest friends and family members.
I told the rest of my social circle by week 3 or so.
Why does this even matter?
Announcing Your Goals to Everyone Can Have a Negative Effect
I’ve learned that telling people your goals, even if they’re your closest support system, can have the wrong effects on you.
First, it opens up the floodgates of opinions.
In my case:
- Why can’t you just have a little alcohol here and there?
- Do you really need to give it up 100%?
- I don’t drink that much so I don’t really see the point
- Switch to lighter beers instead of wine and liquor
- That’s insane! I wouldn’t be able to do that.
Those tiny, seemingly harmless statements are enough to plant the seeds of self-doubt and indecision.
Should I really be doing this?
Do I need to do this?
In some cases, this also opens the doors to criticism, which can be even harder to tackle.
The next big issue with shouting out your goals to the world is that the simple act makes you feel as if you’ve already accomplished the goal.
Your brain actually feels as if you did too.
And when this happens, your motivation starts to wane.
You lose all of that excitement you had when you first started to embark on your goal.
That’s why so many of us find it so exciting to start a new project yet we never have enough momentum to complete it.
When things get messy and uncomfy, we abandon ship and find any excuse for why it wouldn’t work for us.
To avoid this, stop telling people your goals. And you’ll see the difference too.
For those closest to me, I casually mentioned it after a 10 day period or so (my boyfriend was the only one who really new from day 1).
And for the rest of my inner circle, I didn’t bring it up until I was less than 7 days away from hitting my goal.
I also didn’t tell anyone who asked me to grab a drink with them.
I didn’t want it to ruin the vibes so I only brought it up once it was time to order.
Initially, I sipped on green tea while out.
The problem here is that the caffeine in the tea kept me wired and since I was meeting people for drinks after hours I had to put an end to that real quick.
Fast forward to day 22 or so and the habit was finally created.
I had enough days under my belt to feel good but I was also itching to see how far I could take it.
I decided to push past 30 days and extend this feel-good energy to 90 days before I even hit the 30 day mark.
At some point around day 72, I decided that I might as well reach 100 days since it only added 10 more days and I could claim the triple digit status.
I have to say that the hardest stretch was between the 90-100 day mark. That’s when I was ready to call it quits.
It’s also the time where I learned most of the lessons I’ve outlined today.
Speaking of those, enough about me.
Let’s learn some sh!t.
Even If You Don’t Drink, You Can Still Benefit from These Lessons
For those who “don’t drink enough for this to be worth it,” I’d disagree.
Even one glass of alcohol a week is enough for your system to be thrown out of whack.
But if you really don’t drink, or you don’t think giving up booze will have a true impact, I encourage you to give up something else for 30 days.
Poison is not limited to booze.
People who criticize/complain/make you feel less than, sugar, fast-food/junk food, complaining, gossiping, spewing self-limiting beliefs, coffee, caffeine, sitting too much/exercising too little and chocolate are all perfect examples of things you can give up for 30 days.
Put simply, whatever is not making you feel your best or is holding you back, it’s time to ditch. At least for 30 days to start.
After that, when you’re feeling unstoppable, you can decide if it’s worth giving up for good.
Do this and I’m fairly certain you’ll pass through the following lessons with flying colors.
Lesson #1: It’s About Facing Sh!t Head On
When life gets stressful, as it inevitably will, we all have a go-to gut reaction.
For some, it’s a glass of wine.
For others, it’s food (chocolate, junk food, ice cream, candy, etc.)
Some people prefer to do nothing and procrastinate instead.
For me, alcohol made it much easier for me to socialize.
Instead of having to deal with the extra bit of social anxiety that surfaces before I go out and when I’m out, I could use the booze to ease my levels.
It relaxed me and put my extra thoughts on hold temporarily..
It was also a bit terrifying to have to do this without the booze.
But that’s where this lesson comes in.
The booze was a crutch for me.
It was a cozy little blanket that I could use without anyone really noticing.
And instead, I was stripped of that for 100 days.
I had to face my anxieties head on.
And I did.
And I learned how to do this without the booze.
It was like throwing the training wheels off and taking on a huge hill, both up and down.
And it’s one thing I encourage you to do in your own way.
What should you be facing head on that you’re not?
What are you using to avoid having to get uncomfortable?
Food?
Procrastination?
Figure it out and consider giving it up for 30 days.
And if you’re still not convinced, check out my next lesson.
Lesson #2: Holding Yourself Accountable is One of the HARDEST Things You Have to Do in Life
Why is it that we can commit to things for others or even socially without any problem, yet, we can never schedule and commit to things for ourselves?
Case in point: eating healthy and working out.
When it comes time to divvy up our time for the week, these items always seem to fall off the list.
They get shoved to the I’ll just start tomorrow or Monday list which we all know never gets done.
But they’re exactly what we need to feel better for both ourselves and those around us.
And if we treated them like the other concrete things on our schedules, we would be in a better position.
We’re also so used to doing things for others that we don’t ever take the time to do things for ourselves.
It’s foolish really.
You can’t take care of those around you if you’re only operating at 50%.
It’s exactly why we’re instructed to put on our oxygen mask before we do it for kids.
Going booze-free was a way for me to start feeling my best.
And when you choose to eliminate something that’s slowing you down, you’re going to feel your best too.
When you do this, the relationships around you will start to become deeper and better as well.
I personally experienced this on my 100 day booze-free journey.
But doing this is no easy feat.
Holding ourselves accountable is one of the hardest things we have to do.
It’s far easier to make excuses when it comes to us.
We’re only letting ourselves down and most of us are used to doing this.
So we don’t even notice it as a big deal or even a problem.
But it is.
It’s what contributes to us creating goals and never completing them.
In short, it’s what’s holding you back.
But, by giving up something for a mere 30 days, you can change this.
You can start investing in yourself.
And the reward is that you’ll start feeling better almost immediately.
Once this happens, you’ll create positive momentum to keep going and you will continue to do so.
So start committing to yourself like you would with your social obligations and watch what unfolds.
In this next lesson, we’ll talk more about why a 30 day challenge and creating momentum is so effective.
Lesson #3: Small Challenges Create Big Wins
At first, 30 days sounded absolutely daunting and I refuse to sugar coat things and tell you otherwise.
When I first made the decision, I instantly thought about all those times I’d be missing out. Christmas. New Year’s.
Why am I doing this again?
But, like when you start a new job or a fitness routine, you have to take it step-by-step. One foot in front of the other.
And so I did.
I stopped focusing on how far 30 days was and I shifted my tunnel vision to knocking out each day, one at a time.
I’d try not to count the individual days until I was approaching certain milestones, such as 10, 20, 25, etc.
We all know that looking ahead can give you anxiety and focusing on the past can cause depression to surface.
So I kept this in mind on my journey.
I stopped overthinking and planning how things would pan out or how uncomfortable it would be to be the only one not drinking during the holidays.
Instead, I focused on the present day and only that.
When a craving popped up, I had to assess why it was happening.
Is it because I kept seeing people drinking on TV?
Was it because I was around people drinking?
Was self doubt creeping in?
Or was I trying to avoid an unpleasant situation?
Once I uncovered the real issue, I worked through it.
If I was really craving it, I made a mocktail at home.
My favorite was a splash of organic margarita mix in seltzer.
It would do the trick for a fraction of the calories.
Whenever the issue was connected to uneasy feelings, I took to my journal or went for a walk to work things out.
Writing was more effective than walking, but both strategies proved to be way better than nothing at all or drinking instead.
By tackling each day one at a time, you focus less on how hard the task at hand is.
And, more importantly, you stop obsessing over it.
This makes it easier to quell negative self talk and helps you build and flex your discipline muscle, one I’m personally obsessed with.
Plus, knocking out each day gives you a small win. It helps you get one step closer to your big win and gives you the momentum to do so.
Small wins eventually lead to big ones that feel incredible.
Don’t believe me?
Try it for yourself.
Create a 30 day challenge and give up the shit that’s holding you back.
But, before you do, this next lesson is likely to surface so you’ll want to check that out first.
Lesson #4: Your First Response is to Hesitate
I recently learned something so simple yet so often overlooked: We are pre-wired, as humans, to hesitate.
It’s a built-in safety mechanism that’s kept us alive for a crap ton of years now.
But, it’s also what holds us back from stepping even just one foot out of our comfort zone.
Before we do, we naturally come up with all the reasons why something is not a good idea or why it just won’t work.
Is it safe?
Do I really need to make this move?
What happens if I just avoid it? Maybe that will make it go away.
Our brains literally dump a mountain of information as to why we shouldn’t do something.
I appreciate that it’s there to protect us, but it’s really making things worse in many situations.
It’s making our fears much larger than they need to be and it only snowballs situations to be far worse than reality.
If you’re in immediate danger, hesitate, breathe, and think things through.
But if your situation is not life-threatening, then I encourage you to really dissect your reason for hesitating in the first place, especially if you want to improve your current situation which I hope you do since you’re reading this blog 🙂
Are you scared of what the future could look like?
Probably.
Are you hesitating because you know it’s not going to be easy?
Nothing worth it is going to be easy.
Do you lack the faith and courage to believe that you can actually do it?
You can.
You are stronger than you think.
Think about all the shit you’ve already gone through in your life.
I don’t know your personal situation but I do know for certain that setbacks are inevitable. For all of us. Even the rich and famous.
You will get through this.
And a thirty day challenge will help you build enough strength to get you through anything.
You just have to believe that you can do this and the universe will back you up with the tools you need to do so.
Put it out there and I promise it will come back.
This segues perfectly into my last lesson:
Lesson #5: You Will Create Better Habits in No Time
Bad habits are so hard to break while good ones are even harder to make.
This shouldn’t comes as a surprise as I’m sure you’ve dealt with this before too.
But, the reality is, you can create better habits for yourself.
It will take time, persistence, and discipline, but it is possible.
And one of the best tools to do this is by creating — and sticking to—challenges for yourself.
Create a fun challenge (read: not too easy!) and watch how fast you’ll form a better habit.
When I started my alcohol-free journey, I only focused on that.
But once I had 30 days under my belt, I was so motivated to see what else I could do.
I started tracking my food and currently have a 78 day streak.
From this simple move, I uncovered some key dietary mistakes that were holding me back from seeing more progress and having more energy.
I’ve also stuck with a workout program and am currently on my fifth month.
I started this before my booze-free journey, but I can guarantee that I would not have lasted this long had I not gone without the booze.
In short, it created a positive ripple effect in so many other areas for me.
Imagine what you could do.
Instead of letting bad habits creep into everything else, you can do just the opposite and start making real changes to your life.
You have the power and control to do this.
It all starts with small challenges and creating positive habits one day at a time.
Now go forth, choose a challenge, and tell me how you’re feeling each step of the way!
P.S. If you want some extra accountability (for free!), head over to my private Facebook group where I’m offering my support and advice.
P.P.S And if you know someone who could use today’s advice, please don’t hesitate to share it! I’d be forever grateful.