Carbs are bad for you.
No, sugar is the problem.
Actually it’s meat that’s the issue.
Or maybe you’re just eating too much.
That’s essentially a small snapshot of the messages that our current diet culture sends out.
You’re blasted with these in magazines, online, in your social feeds, and anywhere else they can cram them in.
And now there’s skinny teas to add to the fat burning supplements that don’t work list.
But, as you saw in my last guide, diets and these types of gimmicks don’t work.
Not only that, they create unhealthy relationships with food.
So the question is, what does it take to lose weight and be healthy if diets don’t work?
As promised in that guide, the solution — at least for me — is using an Intuitive Eating approach, which I’ll share more about here using information from this book, Intuitive Eating, by Evelyn Tribole, and Elyse Resch (this is not an affiliate link).
I’ll also discuss the 10 principles that go along with this way of eating.
To start though, let’s tackle the basics first.
What is Intuitive Eating?
If you break down intuitive eating based on just the words alone, you may be wondering, so do I just eat what I feel like eating?
And the short answer is sort of, but that’s not the main premise here.
Instead, as the authors of Intuitive Eating, Tribole and Resch, point out, the goal here is to “normalize your relationship with food.”
So what the heck does that mean?
It means that you stop seeing foods as “good” or “bad”.
One slice of cake or a side of mashed potatoes here or there aren’t going to pack on the pounds.
What will is when you restrict the foods you love to the point that you end up binging on them once you get a small taste.
So, Intuitive Eating also means that you shift from this restricted way of eating to one that allows you to fuel your body when it’s hungry instead of starving yourself to lose weight.
And that includes feeding your inner kid who wants something that may be considered unhealthy — (more on this later).
Intuitive Eating also throws out the scale and “puts weight loss on the back burner,” according to Tribole and Resch.
Instead of focusing on this, your attention goes towards making a mind-body-health connection where you get healthy and feel as best as you can.
Before diving into this more, we should talk about how:
Kids Are Intuitive Eaters Without Even Realizing It
Babies know right away if they need more milk and when to call it quits because they’re full.
As they grow up, they start to form their own taste buds and may gravitate towards strawberries over bananas, for example.
Using this as an example, kids don’t know that bananas are higher in sugar and that’s why they should eat the strawberries instead.
They just know that’s what they like in this moment.
Tribole and Resch mention that this is because they don’t have societal messages ingrained in their heads yet.
They just eat as they please.
And, it turns out, they end up getting exactly what they need.
Here’s how:
“Study after study shows that if you let a toddler eat spontaneously, he will eat what he needs when given free access to food.”
Furthermore, another study on preschool-age children confirmed that, “children have an innate ability to regulate their eating according to what their bodies need for growth,” and that, “researchers found that at a given meal, caloric intake was highly variable, but it balanced out over time.”
The problem comes in, as the authors explained, is that children are often pressured into “eating enough” or finishing the plate.
While the intentions are good, this controlling approach is counter-productive, according to Tribole and Resch.
What ends up happening is that kids start to shut off their own fullness mechanisms because they’re being told to “finish their plate.”
But this leads to more complications than just this.
Long-Term Repercussions That You May Even Be Feeling Today
Another study mentioned in the book was from researchers at Duke University.
They noted that, “excess weight in school-age children was highly associated with the degree to which parents tried to restrain their children’s eating.”
And that, “When a parent tries to overrule a child’s natural eating cues, the problem gets worse not better.”
They found that, if parents let go of the pressure on their child, they will end up eating less eventually and once their natural cues are restored.
So what does all of this have to do with you?
Researchers also discovered that a similar pattern happens when children try to be thin.
They stated that these kids “become preoccupied with food, afraid they won’t get enough to eat, and are prone to overeat when they get the chance.”
Does that sound familiar?
It’s exactly like the article from last week on ditching dieting for good.
Dieting causes the same negative side effects.
So if you started dieting as early as your teens, it’s no wonder you’re down this path.
I get it though — society plasters these messages everywhere and throughout these years so it’s hard not to get sucked in.
That’s where Intuitive Eating comes in to (hopefully) fix things.
What Intuitive Eating Is and Isn’t
First, this isn’t another diet plan.
There are no lists of good foods and bad ones.
There’s just a simple fact that no food is off-limits.
You also won’t be tracking calories, carbs, or macros with this way of eating.
So pasta and potatoes can be included if you so choose.
But, instead of going overboard like you used to, you’ll need to pay close attention to how you feel.
Are you really hungry? Or are you just bored or coping with stress?
And, instead of polishing off the plate, you chew slowly and savor each bite and pause halfway to see if you even need to finish the rest.
If you’re someone who was raised not to waste food, pack it back up and save it for tomorrow.
Finishing your plate is unnecessary for a few reasons.
As mentioned earlier, this could mean you ignore your body’s natural fullness signals and overeat to the point of feeling uncomfortable.
Do this and you’ll pack on pounds despite eating healthy foods.
And, as you may have seen, they’re much harder to get off once they’re on.
By saving the rest for later, you avoid that and honor your body’s natural signals.
This way of eating also gives you a chance to see if every bite is really worth it.
You may find that, towards the halfway point, it’s just not as delicious or worth having the rest.
But you won’t be able to get to this point unless you slow down and savor your food.
Take some breaths and please, put down the fork and let your senses experience everything that’s going on.
This will help you naturally eat the right amount for your body without having to measure each morsel.
With that overview out of the way, you’re ready for:
10 Principles of Intuitive Eating
Unlike with diets, these 10 foundational principles of Intuitive Eating are not a set of strict rules for you to adhere to.
Rather, they are mindset shifts that you’ll want to make to get the most out of this new lifestyle.
And it all starts with this one:
1. Reject the Diet Mentality
You’ve heard me talk about this one in a previous guide.
Essentially, diets don’t work.
So you can save your time and money by never reading or ordering anything connected to another diet again.
Most people end up gaining the weight right back after the diet is over, because it’s unsustainable and not enjoyable.
Diets assume that you can’t be trusted around food and you need a series of rules to keep you in place, as the authors note.
This is not true.
Over time, you will be able to trust yourself around food without feeling guilty for your choices.
2. Honor Your Hunger
Intuitive Eating wants you to eat when you’re hungry.
Instead of restricting your intake or cutting back because you’re fasting, you should eat if your stomach is growling.
It’s that simple.
But it’s important that you don’t get yourself to the point of being so-hungry-you-could-eat-a-horse.
This triggers a natural, biological drive to overeat, according to Tribole and Resch.
And, as they mention, “Once you reach the point of excessive hunger, all intentions of moderate, conscious eating are fleeting and irrelevant.”
So, honor your hunger signals before getting to that point and:
3. Make Peace with Food
You’re not bad for wanting to have a Zebra cake here or there or a nice bowl of pasta.
Life is too short to not be enjoyed.
And that goes for enjoying delicious foods too.
It breaks my heart to see people missing out at parties and social gatherings because “they’re being good” or “they’re sticking to their diet.”
If you’re craving something unhealthy, it’s okay to have it.
But, when you do, go slow and take notice of how you feel and how it tastes.
If it doesn’t taste as good as you remembered or hoped, don’t feel obligated to finish it.
By trying it out, you can see if it’s really worth it.
This point also prevents you from Last Supper thinking.
If you’ve ever started a new diet or promised you would be good on Monday, you may have experienced Last Supper tendencies.
This is when you overeat your favorite foods because you know they will be off-limits soon.
As you can imagine by now, this tips you in the wrong direction and leads to more restriction which can tumble into another binge cycle.
On the other hand, when you know your favorite foods are always available, you’ll never have to attend another Last Supper showdown.
And that can happen once you:
4. Challenge the Food Police
You’re not “good” or “bad” for going under or over your calories. You’re just human.
The former is the voice of the Food Police.
It tells you muffins are too fattening or that pizza is off-limits if you want to lose weight.
Whatever it may be for you, it’s time to ditch the Food Police telling you negative things subconsciously.
It’s okay to eat the foods you want.
But…remember to:
5. Feel Your Fullness
Please also stop inhaling your food.
Your body needs time to expand and catch up to what you’re putting in.
So slow down and pay attention to your body letting you know that you don’t need anymore food.
For me, I find a change in taste before I get too full.
With each bite, it’s just not as satisfying.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Some dishes are clean-the-plate-satisfying.
But most aren’t.
And now it’s up to you to decide which ones you actually need to finish.
If, at the halfway mark, you’re still feeling hungry and not close to full, you can obviously finish the plate.
As long as you check in with yourself throughout, you’ll know what’s best for you.
6. Discover the Satisfaction Factor of Food
Another interesting fact the book mentioned is that the Japanese add pleasure as one of their components to healthy living, which I think is great.
Eating should be pleasurable.
It should also be fun and not complicated.
And it shouldn’t be about deprivation and avoiding everything you love.
At its heart, there’s pleasure around eating.
Whether it’s your Grandma’s recipe that brings back memories or you’re just out enjoying a nice meal with friends, life is too short to not eat good food guilt-free.
And once you give yourself permission to really enjoy the foods you love, you may find that you don’t need much to feel satisfied, as the authors note.
I’ve seen this personally and have really noticed a difference.
However, if you’re not in tune with this next principle, you may struggle with this way of eating.
7. Cope With Emotions Without Using Food
Many people don’t realize that food is used as a coping mechanism.
It could be because you’re stressed out at work, have anxiety around an issue with a friend or family member, or a number of other issues.
But, as the authors note, food won’t fix your emotional issues.
Yes, it’s comforting in the short-term, as they mention, but in the end, your problem or issue is still there.
So, if you’re finding yourself turning to food, it’s up to you to recognize that there’s more to the story and you’ll need to get to the bottom of it.
On top of that:
8. Respect Your Body
I loved the analogy Tribole and Resch used in the book: you can’t expect your size 11 foot to fit in a size 6 shoe — it’s just not realistic.
That’s why you’ll need to also “accept your genetic blueprint,” as they put it.
I’m 5’4 and carry most of my weight in my legs. I look much leaner on the top and it’s always been that way.
These are facts I can’t change.
I accept them now and respect my body for being able to do everything that it does.
So I focus on how I can get up each morning, how I can workout when I want, and that my body is strong enough to move.
Who cares that it’s not as tall as a supermodel. It’s still pretty amazing and I’m sure yours is too.
It’s time to stop being unrealistic and overly critical of your body shape, as the authors note. We both know someone looking in would be happy to have it compared to their situation.
9. Exercise — Feel the Difference
This is one of my favorite principles and one of the reasons I workout.
It’s especially helpful for those days when I don’t want to workout.
Once I ditched bootcamp style workouts and lifting heavy in favor of low-impact workouts, I feel so much better.
My body doesn’t hate me and I’m not sore for days at a time like I used to be.
And because I feel so good, I’m more likely to stick with it. Who wouldn’t want to do something that feels good everyday?
I also don’t focus on how many calories I’ve burned anymore. Low-impact workouts can still be effective but they won’t torch that many calories. And I’m okay with that.
Focusing on how you’ll feel better also helps get you out of bed when you’re tempted to hit the snooze button.
What’s not motivating is when you use exercise for weight loss.
Because you don’t see overnight results, it’s harder to want to get up and show up each day when you don’t feel like you’re making progress.
However, on the flipside, when you focus on using exercise to feel better physically and mentally, the feedback loop is instant.
During and after your workout you get a rush of feel good endorphins.
That’s what you should pay attention to and you’ll have no problem wanting to clock in a workout each day.
This is how I’ve kept up with a consistent routine for several years now. And it starts between 6-6:45 am each day.
Even a simple walk or yoga class is enough to see these benefits.
But, I encourage you to find exercises you actually enjoy and ones that won’t put too much strain on your body and joints.
And, finally, there is one point about nutrition in these principles.
10. Honor Your Health with Gentle Nutrition
Your food choices should cater to both your health and your taste buds.
So, just like with exercise, choose foods that make you feel good and that also promote better health.
You know these foods — they’re in their whole form and unprocessed.
And, if you decide to weave in a treat here and there, it’s not going to wreck your goals as long as you don’t go overboard.
Check in with yourself to see if you really need to finish something or if you’re using it as a coping mechanism.
As the authors note, “It’s what you eat consistently over time that matters,” and, “Progress, not perfection, is what counts.”
So eat those healthy foods as often as possible and you’ll be able to safely weave in some of your childhood favorites — or whatever you’re craving.
Intuitive Eating is Simple and Straightforward
After reading this, you can see that Intuitive Eating is not a restrictive dieting plan — it’s just the opposite and it’s not a diet at all.
Instead, it’s about creating a better relationship with food, one that doesn’t consume you or make you miserable.
If you’re considering this type of eating style, I’d encourage you to familiarize yourself with the 10 principles to start.
You can also check out the Intuitive Eating website for more information and to buy the book, which turned out to be an eye-opener for me.
And if you have any questions on this topic, or you’d like to explore it further, feel free to drop a comment below this post or send me a private message via email at devan@behappynothangry.com. I’d love to hear from you!
To joining the anti-diet movement,
Devan